Exam Jokes

Exam Jokes

It’s exam season at the moment with lots of people getting their results, so here are some exam jokes. I remember getting my A level results really clearly, best wishes to all those who just got their results. Of course, these jokes as normal come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…     Just […]

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Rocket Jokes

The Polish Aviation Museum

The topic for this week’s page of puns is rocket jokes, so hopefully these will take off. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…     I used to wonder if Elton John liked lettuce, then realised he’s more of a rocket man.   Got my friend an unnecessarily large rocket […]

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Shell Jokes

Shell

Inspired by a few recent summertime trips to the seaside, this week’s puns and one liners take the form of shell jokes.  As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality….  And a few of them do stretch the definition of shell.     If you listen to a UNIX shell, can you […]

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Mirror Jokes

This week’s topic for one liners and puns is Mirror Jokes, so reflect on these.  As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality.   I held up my clock to a mirror. It was time for reflection.   What does a cheese say to itself in a mirror? Halloumi.   Think I […]

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Fan Jokes

A fan

The sun has been shining during this first week of July, and there have been plenty of fans and air conditioning units hard at work, so here are some fan jokes.  As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…   A friend of mine used to love farm machinery, now he’s great […]

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ATM Jokes

ATMs

The ATM, or cash machine, reached its fiftieth birthday in the U.K. this week.  To mark the occasion, here are some ATM jokes, some of which may be older than the machines themselves.  They were always designed for humour, with their launch being made by a celebrity first customer, Reg Varney, before he moved on […]

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Lamp Jokes

This week’s topic for puns is Lamp Jokes. However, no genie (or djini) in the lamp jokes here as that could be a page all by itself, a bit like the “how many x does it take to change a lightbulb” type, which no doubt will arrive here at some stage. Don’t, as always, expect […]

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Pepper Jokes

The topic for this week’s puns is Pepper Jokes, so take them with a pinch of salt. As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…     Someone told me I looked like a pepper mill. I took it as a condiment. Why do seals live in salt water? Pepper makes them […]

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Pencil Jokes

I was looking for some stationery this week, and it made me think about topics for a page of puns. We’ve had ruler jokes before, so on a similar theme, here are some pencil jokes. As normal, they come with no guarantee of either hilarity or originality…     A policeman came up to me […]

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Tie Jokes

Ties

After last week’s shirt jokes, it was suggested that this week’s one liners should take the form of tie jokes, so here are a few.  As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…     A man walks into a retro shop in Birmingham. He says “I’d like a kipper tie please”. […]

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Shirt Jokes

A shirt

This week’s page of one liners takes the theme of shirt jokes. As normal they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality.     “I’m not very good at pressing my shirts”, I said with no sense of irony. On eBay; “For sale, Incredible Hulk t-shirt. Usual wear & tear”. A friend of mine […]

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Password Jokes

Like most people, I’ve had that annoying experience of trying to think of a new password that is complex enough to be secure and memorable enough to be useful, and that seemed as good a topic as any, so here are some password jokes.  Don’t worry, none of them are too cryptic, but don’t expect […]

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