Queue Jokes

This week’s topic for one liners is queue jokes, or standing in line jokes for those on the other side of the Atlantic.  Don’t worry, there’s not a long wait for these, but there might also be not too much hilarity or originality….  And if you are curious about the photo of the queue that leads to this post, have a look here to find out why those Stormtroopers are all lined up.



Saw a bunch of people eating burgers whilst waiting for the launch of a new toy doll. It was a Barbie queue.

Dreamt last night that I had a long wait to get coffee and when I got there this morning there were already lots of people waiting. Think I was experiencing Deja Queue.

Big queue of traffic on my street because the traffic lights are broken. No change there.

I could tell the traffic queue was long when my Sat Nav said “Are we nearly there yet?”

I went to a fancy dress pool party once. There was a large cue outside.

Tried driving in Cairo once, it was chaos. Lots of queues, noise everywhere. Full of tooting car men.

Got stuck for ages behind Satan in the queue at the Post Office. For the devil takes many forms.

Managed to join the queue before Snow White and one of the dwarves. He wasn’t happy.

I called the impatience sufferers helpline. I’m in a queue.

Called to book tickets for an Elvis tribute act and got one of those electronic queuing systems. Had to press one for the money, two for the show…



Last week’s x-ray jokes are here.


If you like these, have a look here.