I had a look at what searches commonly bring people to this site, and one of the most popular is – oddly enough – hairdresser jokes, so I thought it was time to add some hairdresser jokes, puns and one-liners, although this list includes lines about hair, and a lack of hair. If you are the person or people who keeps searching for these, then I hope that you like these. They come with the usual caveats about the lack of originality or funniness.
I saw an advert saying “Hairpieces from £5”. I thought, “That’s a small price toupee”.
How does the man in the moon cut his hair? Eclipse it.
I used to not like my hair. Then it grew on me.
I went into the barber’s shop the other day, and spotted that he had dirty hands. . He said, “I can’t help it. I haven’t had anyone in for a shampoo yet today’.
I like watching football matches when I’m at the hairdressers The coverage is the same but the highlights are better.
A chap walks into a barber’s shop with a young boy. The man has his hair cut, and as the boy is getting a trim, the chap says “I’ll nip out to the supermarket whilst you get your hair cut”. Half an hour later, the haircut is finished but the man hasn’t returned. The barber says “I think your dad has forgotten about you”. The boy says “Oh, that’s not my dad. He just stopped me on the street and asked if I wanted a free haircut, then brought me here”.
Just after a friend went bald, he inherited a comb. He said he will never part with it.
I know a bald chap who put a rabbit on his head. He wanted a head of hare.
Another bald chap I know never uses keys now. He’s lost his locks.
A man goes to see his barber to get his hair cut. The barber says “You’re going grey, sir”. The man says “I’m not surprised, hurry up, would you…”
A few years ago, I asked the girl in the pet grooming shop out to dinner. She couldn’t make it though, she was washing her hare.
If vampires have no reflection, how do they do their hair?
Been invited to a hair washing party. I’ve no excuse not to go.
Last week’s accent jokes – including one about a hairdresser – are here.
The index of similar jokes is here.