lactose

Cow Jokes

For some bizarre reason, cows have been quite a theme for me this week, and as such, the appropriate theme for this week’s puns seemed to be cow jokes. I had a relatively recent encounter with some cows, there are some details here.

 

These come as always with no guarantee of funniness or originality…

 

 

 

Two cows in a field on a cold winter’s night. One cow says to the other, “I don’t know about you but I’m fresian”.

 

Two cows in a field. One says to the other “Moo”. The other says “I was going to say that”.

 

What goes “oom, oom”? A cow walking backwards.

 

Why do cows have hooves rather than feet? Because they lactose.

 

Who is the most famous cow comedian? Laugh-A-Bull.

 

What has one horn and provides milk? A dairy lorry.

 

Deja-Moo: That feeling that you have heard this bull before.

 

What happens when a cow stops shaving? It grows a moostache.

 

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the udder side.

 

To err is human. To moo, bovine.

 

What do you get from a forgetful cow? Milk of Amnesia.

 

A friend of mine thought that the local farmer was a magician because he heard that he had turned his cows into a field.

 

How do you know when it is time for cows to go to sleep? When it’s pasture bedtime.

 

What goes “booo, booo, booo”? A cow with a cold.

 

What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.

 

..and the first joke that I ever learned, back in the late 1970s: Why do cows have cow bells? Because their horns don’t work.

 

 

 

..and there are some more cow jokes here

 

Last week’s hairdresser jokes are here.

If you like these cow jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics.

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