schrodinger's cat

Cat Jokes

The topic for this week’s collection of puns and one liners is cat jokes.  As normal, they come with no guarantee of hilarity or originality…

 

I spotted a lion at the zoo the other day. He looks like a leopard now.

 

Lost money playing poker with one of the big cats at the zoo. Think he was a cheetah.

 

Went for dinner with the zoo animals the other day. They didn’t all bring their wallets, I ended up paying the lion’s share.

 

A man goes into a library and asks for a book about Pavlov’s dogs and Schrodinger’s cat. The librarian says, “It rings a bell, but I don’t know whether it’s there or not”

 

What is crunchy and says meow? A bis-cat.

 

My lion impression went down well. A roaring success.

 

At any given time, the urge to sing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” is never more than a whim away.

 

Got invited to the neighbours for pre-Christmas drinks with nibbles. They really spoil that cat.

 

I saw a big cat wearing a very flamboyant hat and cape the other day. I think it was a dandy lion.

 

Friend of mine used to take a bit of pride in his job. He was a lion thief.

 

I’m a whisker away from completing my model of a cat.

 

Why did the lion get lost? Because jungle is massive.

 

 

Last week’s circus jokes are here.

 

If you like these cat jokes, there is an index of joke topics here.