A few cheesy corny puns for a Friday

As normal, a few cheesy corny puns for a Friday, and as normal, they are not original, not new, and mostly not that funny.  But hopefully they will raise a few groans….



Ticket inspectors; you’ve got to hand it to them…


A guy told me to buy shares in a company that makes alcohol from apples. He’s been done for in-cider trading…


I got an e-mail saying ‘At Google Earth we can read maps backwards!’ I thought, “That’s just spam.”


Why didn’t the sailors play cards? A. Because the captain was sitting on the deck.


Broken pencils are pointless.


I wonder if zebras appear more slender than they actually are because of how they wear their stripes?


I was in a restaurant earlier this week and a chap asked for 27 fluid ounces of wine.- I thought “he’s having a carafe”….


I was driving to work this morning when I saw a sign saying ‘Low Trees’. So I stopped, got out and gave one a cuddle.


Lollipop ladies make me cross.


Old Macdonald spelled ‘redirection’ without any consonants.




There is an index of equally awful puns here